Alrighty, well thats E3 all done and dusted. There was much pomp, flair and cringing at EVERY press conference but still, within all that there were in fact some games and other baubles to be gawped at. So, like the end of a childrens party, once we’ve swept up all the wrapping paper and mopped up all the vomit, what have we left to show for it? What gifts do we want to keep and what do we cynically send straight to the good people on Ebay?
Oh. It’s…em..just what I wanted. Thanks?
‘The Last Of Us’
I’m not going to lie. This game looks great. From what I’ve seen, it appears that the people who brought you Uncharted have not been sitting on their hands. The demo shown at the Sony press conference was rather on the action heavy side ogf things, however seeing other videos of that same demo being gone through in a much more sneaky and quiet fashion give me much hope for this game.
Also, it just looked so very tangibly violent. Everything seemed to have a real weight to it and the prospect of having it be a serious undertaking to try and take on two guys after Uncharted’s meat grinder approach to dealing with wave after wave of enemies seems like it could be much more immersive and frsh experience. We shall see.
“You were such an asshole that I’m willing to waste one of my precious shells on your face!“
The Wii U in general
I am worried about Nintendo. Ever since the 3DS pretty much bombed (yes, I know it’s selling as well as the DS was at the same point in it’s original cycle but it shifted a whole hell of a lot more units to begin with) there has been something of a lack of anything interesting on the development side of things. Up to now it seemed they were content to slap a 3D coat of paint on much of their old back catalogue and re-release it or try to remedy bad design BY INCLUDING A STAND WITH KID ICARUS TO ENABLE YOU TO PLAY IT ON YOUR HAND-HELD CONSOLE, THUS MAKING ONE OF IT’S DEFINEING CHARACTERISTICS NULL AND VOID…
Wow, now I can play this anytime, anywhere….as long as there’s a flat surface!
So here I am hoping that the Wii U will be the life preserver Nintendo needs to stay afloat as they drown financially. I’m thinking that I maybe shouldn’t bet on that.
There are several reasons why the Wii U’s showing at E3 worries me. Firstly, The game they chose to show it off was Rayman. Not Mario, Metroid or Zelda. Instead they chose a property much more closely associated with Sony than anyone else. Yes, there was a Sew Super Mario Brothers, but to be honest I’m pretty sick of those games already. Though I must say that Rayman Origins was an absolutely fantastic little platformer and there certainly were some interesting mechanics going on there.
Then of there was ZombiU. Forgive me for not trusting a trailer to tell me the whole truth about a game, but really? No in-game footage, just a suspiciously simailar tone to the very misleading trailer for Dead Island. Not a good sign.
This is for making me move you Zombie gobshite!
Several other games that where shown were, unfortunately games that are already available on other platforms. Batman: Arkham City and Mass Effect 3 among them. Now, while this is a good sign that perhaps Nintendo are being much more favourable towards working with third party developers, they are both games that will have been out for a rather long while before the Wii U is released “this holiday season”.
But don’t worry, because even if these games aren’t out on release we’ll have… uh.. well, Netflix.. Oh.. Great.. Netflix. And f&@king Youtube.
I suppose that whole Nintendoland thing was pretty cool. Oh wait, no it ddidn’t. It looked like a bunch of crappy watered down minigames that are essentially tech demos for the new hardware that have been given the skins of things Nintendo make that we like in the hopes that we’ll mistake them for the one’s we know and love. But if a big fat crazy person were to remove your mothers face and duct tape it on to his own, I have a funny feeling you won’t be as thrilled about whatever it is he’s cooked for you. But still.. Hooray!
Also, upon hearing that the (apparently) prohibitively expensive tablet controller is a single touch device bodes more ill. A lack of any kind of price indication is also a little surprising.. and worrying.
I really like Nintendo and it’s good that they are trying new things and branching out, but I really don’t want the Wii U to be Nintendo’s Dreamcast.
Star Wars 1313
Okay. This is the best looking game ever. Please forgive the hyperbole but it’s just true. I have never seen a game that looks as pretty as this. It’s very impressive. But alas, probably a long way off.
I have serious doubts that this game will make it on to current generation consoles and I’m quite sure that the PC hardware that was running the demo must the the most terrifyingly hig-end of high-end sh&t. Still, it’s hard not to get excited about a Star Wars game that IS ACTUALLY BEING DEVELOPED BY LUCASARTS!!!!!
Also, probably unlike many of you neck bearded fanboys out there, I am thrilled to hear that this game will concentrate on very much being far from any events from any of the movies and WILL CONTAIN NO JEDI OR FORCE MANIPULATION AT ALL!
Although I’ll not lie, it looks like force powers could come in handy at some stages of the game.
All of my favourite games in the Star Wars universe usually centred around all of the other aspects that made it great. X-Wing, Tie Fighter and X-Wing Vs. Tie Fighter concentrated heavily on the practicalities of space travel and space combat in that context and I also much preferred the fiction of the first Dark Forces game over the force-power heavy sequels that followed it.
Also… I WANNA BE A BOUNTY HUNTER!
Watch Dogs
This looked great. I am therefore hesitant.
Watching the demo for this game was initially very impressive and it seemed that there were many options about how to handle the situations in which the player character found himself. But I couldn’t help wondering if perhaps the options that where used in that demo were maybe the only ones which would have worked.
If this game can deliver on what it seems to be promising then I am certainly very very excited for it’s release, but I’ve been hurt by pretty things before (Damn you Heart Of Darkness), sometimes quite brutally (I’m looking at you Rise Of The Robots).
And it is so very,very pretty.
Borderlands 2
This game looks like Borderlands only prettier and generally better. These are good things. I have no doubt it will fill these criteria. That is all.
XCOM: Enemy Unknown
The more I see this game the more I feel like I just want to get my hands on it. I also feel myself wishing that when Syndicate became a first-person shooter they also contracted Firaxis to make an RTS reboot. Alas, this was not so.
Technically this wasn’t really an E3 announcement as there has been plenty of info about this game before hand, but they had it at the show so I’m using that as an excuse to get it on people’s radars. It looks f@&king awesome and if it’s anything like the original it’s going to eat up a huge chunk of my life and hopefully yours.
Dead Space 3
When I first saw the videos for this game, the third installment in a series that I have very much fallen in love with (or I just don’t hate it. sometimes it’s confusing) I was a little worried as the prescence of a co-op partner and what seemed to be an all-out-action-bonanza (sorry) made me a little concerned as for me, the best parts of dead space were always the lonliest and quietest moments in which strange and horrible noises that may or may not be far away filled my ears and made me feel like maybe I should check over my shoulder and -OH GOD IN HEAVEN! THERE’S ONE RIGHT THERE!
There’s nothing to fear but fear itself…..and this thing.
But then I remembered how Dead Space 2 was marketed in much the same way and, while it did certainly have a much more fast-paced and cinematic bent, there was still plenty of lonely despair and isolation to be had. As such I am more than happy to give Visceral Games the benefit of the doubt and trust them to come through for me once again.
So, that’s all of E3 for me. I don’t give a sh&t about Microsofts Smartglass and the people who actually applauded during the Microsoft press conference when they announced internet explorer for Xbox who aren’t employee’s of Microsoft should probably be quietly “put to sleep” somewhere out of the way.
Many of the other games seem very much to be stop-gaps between consoles to keep franchises relevant (most noteably Gears Of War: Retribution) until they can announce games for whatever the hell they are calling the new generation. But, of course that requires them announcing next-gen consoles (or Gen 12 or whatever the hell you want to call it) which is what I guess we’ll have to look forward to at next years E3.
And seriously, if you know anyone who might know someone who was at the Microsoft press conference and who willingly applauded the IE announcement you tell them “a big f@&k you” from me and tell them we don’t need them anymore.
God bless…
